Tyler and Joshua are training for the Green Bay/Cellcom 5K. when we miss practices at school I follow behind them in the vehicle with my flashers on. I'm so proud of them!

I like to let the kids do the work themselves - so it isn't 'picture perfect.' Joshua did his science fair project on 'Changing States: Solid, Liquid, Gas.' He did a pretty good job!

Venting. . .

Well, after the year I've had on the PTO at my son's elementary school and knowing that the commitment I've made will be keeping me around next school year - I feel exhausted. I've had plenty of time to recuperate from Family Fun Night but everytime I think about PTO related 'stuff' I begin to feel irritated. Angry. Stressed. This is not what volunteering should be like. IF I could step down - I would. IF there were a plethera of volunteers who would be willing to take my place - I wouldn't care who I pissed off or let down (except my kid) - I'd do it, I'd step down. But, there is no one who'd be willing to step up - considering the only gal contemplating being next year's vp is on the fence and shows real reluctance. Unfortunately, I think she'll step up for the same reason I did: There's no one else and I don't want to let others down. By others - I mean the kids. I, personally, have already begun to let parents down. I have a hard time finding nice things to say about being a part of the PTO. I love it - but I hate what it's become: a demand. Worse than a job. And I don't even get paid for it. And, that is why I say it's unfortunate this gal may step up. I hate the idea that someone else will face the feelings I have. But, then again, maybe I'm just not cut out for this kind of work - leadership. Not everyone is meant to fill that role and I don't feel bad about it. I prefer being laid back and comfortable as oppposed to chasing a dream and living up to expectations whether they are mine or those of others. Maybe there was a time when I was that person. But, it has ocurred to me more and more lately, that being PTO president isn't as important as helping in the classroom. My child doesn't know about the meetings and behind the scenes planning that benefits him in the long run. But, when I have to leave him home with his brothers so I can attend a meeting - that has begun to bug me. But, worse is when I answer emails or work on flyers, or an amazing slideshow, or anything PTO related that causes me to say, "Not now. Maybe later." Then, it's too late and I've not spent that time with him that he wanted with me.

So, tell me - why don't I just say 'screw it' and step down? ???? Why is it so hard not to put my kids first and go back to being the parent that helps where it matters (to my kids)? Tyler wanted me to be the book club parent for his 6th grade house earlier this year. I said, 'maybe next year.' Why? Because I was tangled up with Family Fun Night.

Here's the truth: I want to quit. If a parent comes to me and says they want to have my job - I'll gladly give it to them. I want PTO stuff out of my house. Truthfully, I feel the PTO ruining the 1st and 2nd grade years I have with my last child. I'll never get these times back. This is it - the last chance I have.

. . . What do I do?

Fire!

All I said was - go get the matches and we'll see if they work still (b/c the boys left them out by the fire pit in the rain).  I wanted to try out our new portable fire pit and sit in our new patio furniture and enjoy the evening. 

What I did NOT say was - test them out and drop the matches where you please.

So, Tyler did light a match.  Apparently he did blow it out but because the leaf pile was soooo dry - it started up again.  Well, I'm telling you now - I am sooo thankful we have (had) a fire extinguisher in the house!  Very handy!

Joshua Golfing! He's pretty darn good!

What a Week!

Well, I have been looking at job openings since 2010, on Career Builder. I've often applied but have never gotten an interview. Usually, they weed me out over the phone due to my lack of experience. But, anyway - I applied for a job at Evergreen Care Center in Shawano - got a call that day, and an interview two days later! So, I interviewed and it went quite well! My lack of experience wasn't seen as a huge problem because that means they can 'mold' me (thier words). The following day my current job called to ask if I'd be willing to switch to another project with training for it beginning this week. So, of course I said, 'yes.' Although, I'd hate to turn around and disappoint them if I do get offered the nursing home job - because I'll take it even though it means I'll suffer a decreased income - its just a necessary step if I ever want to do 'real' nursing again. In the meanwhile, my mom had an interview, and got the job! She'll be working full-time at a daycare! And, her current job has agreed to keep her on for weekends only.

Now, the only negative here is that my kids are off all week for spring break - and I have training at home. Oh well - at least the weather is supposed to be nice!

A LOL Moment. . .

So, we have our first snow day. Tyler gets up and comes downstairs, dilly-dally's a little bit, then heads up stairs. On his way up he says to me: "This will be the last time you see me today." I'm like, "oh, really? Why?" He says (with an 'as if I should already know' attitude) "You know." So, I start guessing: watching a movie, etc. "No, it begins with an 'M.'"

UM - I said, "Tyler!" And, then he's looking at me - all perplexed, then shakes his head and says, "Mine Craft." As if, 'duh.'

LOL!

You play Mine Craft allllll you want, baby!

:)

Great Movie!

Real Steel with Hugh Jackman (and an extremely adorable kid). Such a feel good movie. I wish I'd seen it in theaters but I never even saw a preview for it! It's a top 10, that's for sure. And, I'm pretty sure it is now Joshua's favorite movie. He's watched it twice in as many days. He said he loved me for buying it! :) Don't rent it - go buy it! You'll be glad you did!

My Day

I had an enjoyable day. I cleaned (well, really I 'super-straightened') the house because Andy and his kids were coming to pick up Sky and Tyler to go ice fishing. And, on the off-chance they came in - I wanted it to look less like a home for pigs and more like - well, a nice, clean home. House straightened, myself showered, and only the daughter comes in to pee. That's okay because my chores are done before 9 am! Get a last minute call that someone else can work the Reading Rewards Store for me and I can sit on rear end with no cares in the world and finish my most recent episode of Inspector Lewis (because his side kick is pleasing to watch!). Then, a last minute decision is made to go to Menards to buy bricks for lining my landscaping (when the ground thaws - but, it was on sale now). So, I really gave my mom no choice but to come with me - even without a shower (she didn't smell too bad) - and we headed out. Went for lunch at Olive Garden, drove by bank, dropped her off at home - went to be a parent helper in Joshua's classroom, had a trip to Wally world (and I will, from now on, be heading out to DePere!). Stopped for some Little Ceasar's - came home and I had a few minutes before I had to take Justin (and Brennan - neighborhood boy) to Friday Fun Night at the middle school. Came home and me and mama and Robbie watched Bridesmaids while Joshua watched Real Steal. Then, I had to go pick the kiddos up. Now - I know it sounds like I did a lot of running around but - it was a no pressure kidn of running around and I enjoyed it. I was happy with the outcome of Family Fun Night - but it really took my life away. Soooo happy it's over with. I took Sky and the kids out to bowling and pizza yesterday, too. And, tomorrow I plan on making a thank you card and doing some scrapping - plus, there's this project I got from Pinterest that I'm trying to duplicate. It's time consuming, though. I'm in a happy mood! :)

Neville Public Museum

These are mostly pictures from our visit to the Neville Public Museum. What a great time! Most of the shots are from Moneyville. Joshua had a good time counting change; Mama, Justin, Robbie, and Tyler were learning about buying and selling stock - and, Tyler and Joshua used a rotary phone for the first time! :)

Also, pic's of Josh at basket ball practice and Justin's note from a girl. He said 'yes.' Awww! :)

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

No time to breathe! But, I'm not complaining.

Well now that Family Fun Night is over you'd think I could relax. Nope. That is not the case. Flyers for the book fair, help my helpers find help (that's a never-ending loop), sign up to work shifts myself b/c we have such a lack of volunteers, and on another PTO note I need to help a friend with the science fair. Off PTO, I had to thouroughly clean my house to host Bunco - which was a choice I made and don't regret - it was a fun evening, but I had no idea this month would be so full (and as our principal mentioned - it's the shortest month of the year!). But, I do have to be honest - when I say thouroughly cleaned the house - I mean the main floor. You can't walk upstairs without looking down to find footing. I am waiting for the Mondays and Fridays I have off from work AND extracurricular activites to clean up there whhile the kids are in school. Just knowing it's a disaster up there makes me feel bogged down. Plus, I want to go to the Y on Monday's and Fridays - I don't put myself first - it just seems wrong to do so. But, the more I keep going on and on like this - I just might have to 'get over it.' :)I love the PTO but I don't love having my hand in it all. The reading program, science fair, and being VP were by design - Family Fun Night (which required my time, money, and more) ran from October to February and Book Fair, in Fall and in Spring - those blindsided me and two others who had to step up - because no one else would. It's for the kids - it's for the school, which I support whole-heartedly, and yes - I do do it for me (a purpose, socialization, etc.). So, I'm just going to have work super hard to find volunteers for next year - especially the book fair. The district rep and local rep keep calling me - wanting to set up meetings, etc. I flat-out told the local rep I didn't want this particular job and hope to have someone else take it over next year.

Well, that's enough of a break - I must get back to work. (Thumbs down - I just need to win the lottery. But, it helps to actually play it, huh?)

Family Fun Night 2012

These pictures speak for themselves! But, I have to say that everyone on our committee worked exceptionally hard to make this year's FFN the best! I pushed for the Balloon Room which was a hit because kids love balloons - but having the kids walking around with them - decorated the school. It was so cool! The Jail that Ross and his neighbor built was fantastic! The kids loved (okay - so the adults, too) having people arrested or having friends arrested - by real police officers! The food was great, pizza from Figaros and cookies from Hardees - I just can't stop thinking about our success! From raffle baskets to the silent auction - from food to games, let's not forget the prizes!, and 50/50 - our FFN WAS the best! Woohooo!

But, I am glad it's over. LOL!

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Heart-Shaped pee . . . hehehe

 
 
 
 
 
Elvis's heart shaped pee! LOL! Too funny!

And I call myself a nurse. . .

So, Joshua got a boo-boo yesterday. It's on the palm of his hand - I think as he was coming off the slide at school (obviously head first) he put out his hands and slid on the pavement. There is a small chunk of skin that was 'lifted.' Apparently, he was doctored at school by the secretary, which is fine. When he finally got around to showing it to me yesterday - there are things I should've done, but didn't. I should've been a good nurse, or the 'good mom,' and cleaned it right away, applied neopsorin, and bandaged it. I should have. But, I wasn't in 'nursing mode' and the 'boy boo-boo, show no fear, not a big deal, oh well' mom in me said, "What were you doing?" "Did Barb give you a band-aid?" Replies: he told me a longer version of his adventures at recess, and "yes." Story done. Situation over. My next comment was directed at my mother, "are you going to make cornbread?" So, as you can see, there was no 'fore-thinking' on my part and I carried on with the evening, at which time, we were in the middle of working out what was for dinner.

Now, 20 minutes before he's supposed to head out to the bus he shows me his boo-boo - not thinking anything is wrong. The first thing I noticed was it was puffy. Puffy. Hmm. So, I went to feel at which time Joshua must have realized, 'something must not be right!' After some "no, no, no" I was able to hold his hand and feel his boo-boo. It was hard. That's odd. It shouldn't be puffy and it shouldn't be hard. So, the initial impression was it needed to be sliced open, cleaned, flap laid flat, neosporined and bandaged. But, I lack in the confidence area - to do that myself, knowing my exacto knife would need to be thouroughly sterilized (not to mention, it has a dull blade), I would need to take him to the doctor. Well, my husband thinks I take the kids (and myself) to the doc for the most tedious of things so I sought his opinion in the rare hope he'd automatically defer to my judgement. No such luck.

So, after him making me feel even less competent in my knowledge as a nurse, I proceeded to burn a needle, poke my kids' boo-boo, and press on the lump of puffy skin to 'push out' any puss. Well, 1st of all - the needle hole is too small to push anything out - doesn't matter if it's liquid. So, as the bus was due to arrive any minute - I neosporined him, band-aided him, and kicked him out the door with his hand in the air (because now, you know, he's not going to use and will gaurd it with his life). So, we'll see what it looks like when he gets home.

Why did I become a nurse????? Because I loved Candy-striping and my husband suggested that since I loved it so much - go to school to be a nurse. LONG stretch, people! Marketing, design, writing, etc - that's more my avenue. But, it's a wee bit too late now.

:(

I sincerely hope that when I'm old, regardless of my situation, I find reason to be happy and not painfully bitter. When my granny dies I think the sorrow I will feel will be because of the ways she's spent the last years of her life. I've already said good-bye in my heart because I can't tolerate speaking to her on the phone. She may start out sweet but the conversation always turns to how much she hates a given person at that moment. And, she justifies herself! This would be much harder if I lived near her still. But, where we once spoke on the phone daily, we now go months - and she's the one who calls me. I will do my best to remember her in her younger years and all the positive influence she had on my life. Unfortunately, I must remember the bad as well - if only so I can keep fresh in my mind - what I do not want to become.